Don't Be a Fool

"For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: all these evil things come from within and defile the man..." Mark 7:21-

Let's dissect this scripture (I loved dissection labs in school!)

• from within, out of the heart of men-from inside us comes:
• evil thoughts-"Sow a thought, reap an act; Sow an act, reap a habit; Sow a habit, reap a character; Sow a character, reap an eternal destiny." William Makepeace Thackeray
• adultery, fornications-"Thou shalt not commit adultery" Exodus 20:14
• murders-"Thou shalt not kill" Exodus 20:13
• thefts-"Thou shalt not steal" Exodus 20:15
• covetousness-"Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbor's" Exodus 20:17
• wickedness-"they that plow iniquity, and sow wickedness, reap the same." Job 4:8
• deceit-"Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor" Exodus 20:16
• lasciviousness-"Those priests who did go forth among the people did preach against...all manner of lasciviousness" Alma 16:18
• an evil eye-"He that hasteth to be rich hath an evil eye" Proverbs 28:22
• blasphemy-"Put off all these; anger wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth." Colossians 3:8
• pride-"But beware of pride, lest thou shouldst enter into temptation." D&C 23:1
• defile the man-desecrate the man, woman, teen or child.

So foolishness is this serious? In Proverbs 9:6, it says, "Forsake the foolish, and live." Do you remember what happened to the the foolish man who built his house upon the sand? What about the five foolish virgins? Perhaps we need to consider foolishness more seriously and its effect upon our youth.

In Titus 2:4-6 we read, "That they (the aged women) may teach the young women to be sober...Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded." How can we teach them to "flee also youthful lusts" (2 Timothy 2:22)

Don't be a:

Forgo some good things in order to choose others that are better or best.

In his talk "Good, Better, Best", Elder Oaks teaches that "The reality that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason for doing it. The number of good things we can do far exceeds the time available to accomplish them. Some things are better than good, and these are the things that should command priority attention in our lives."

The best things are:

• Personal spiritual activities: personal prayer and personal scripture study which comes easier to children who have had-
• Family spiritual activities: family prayer, family scripture study and Family Home Evening.
• Work at home and for an employer.
• Young Men and Young Women Mutual activities. Attending Mutual each week will bring blessings of testimony, service, relationships and life-skills to your children. Occasionally leaders become overzealous in their desire to bless your children's lives and too many activities become scheduled. It is okay, even desirable, to communicate this to leaders, but the once-a-week Mutual activity with an occasional special event is a blessing.
• Developing talents but not at the expense of "skipping youth activities or cutting family time in order to participate in soccer leagues or to pursue various entertainments. Some young people are amusing themselves to death-spiritual death." Dallin H. Oaks
• Service.
• Dinner as a family-"what your family really wants for dinner is you." Dallin H. Oaks.
• Wholesome recreational activities as a family.

Open the door, I will come in to him. (Rev. 3:20)

The first part of this scripture is "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice and..." Our Savior is knocking at our door and desires to enter. Do our children hear it, or is their Ipod on with their ear buds in? If they cannot hear the knock, they won't open the door.

Does your child know how the Holy Ghost speaks to men and more specifically, to him?

When was the last time your child felt a prompting from the Holy Ghost? Did they act upon it? Did they tell you about it?

When was the last time your family felt the Spirit? during family prayer? family scripture study? Family Home Evening?

When was the last time you prayed with each child individually, petitioning Heavenly Father for their welfare?

Offer your whole souls as an offering to him. (Omni 1:26)

"He who seeketh to find his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it." Matt. 10:39.

"As you devote yourself to serving others, you will draw closer to Heavenly Father. Your heart will be filled with love. Your capacities will increase, and your life and the lives of those around you will be blessed." For the Strength of Youth, p. 38

The Young Men and Young Women organizations offer great service activities, but don't let those opportunities be the only ones your child participates in. "Young women and men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will." D&C 59:27

Help them look for the need. Who in your family could use help? siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles?

What about your neighbors? a young mother, an elderly couple, a lonely widow, or a grumpy old man?

What community programs could use an extra hand? a local food bank or senior citizen center?

What donations does the Humanitarian Center need?

Your teen could start a weekly service day during the summer and bring together friends from Young Women, school, and work complete projects to improve the lives of others. That is a much better use of time than logging multiple hours of television, Internet, or video games.

Learn wisdom in thy youth. Learn to keep the commandments of God. (Alma 37:35)

When I really want to learn something, especially in the gospel, I often study its opposite. In studying gratitude for a Personal Progress experience, I found that I learned a lot more about gratitude and thankfulness as I studied ingratitude. To learn about wisdom and being wise, study foolish or foolishness for family scripture study and let your children tell summarize what they learned.

In my latest study of the Book of Mormon, I am truly amazed at the number of times the prophets say, "And inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments, ye shall prosper in the land." Wisdom declares that "in this there is saftey, in this there is peace."

"There is only one way to happiness and fulfillment. Jesus Christ is the Way. Every other way, any other way, whatever way is foolishness." Lawrence E. Corbridge, "The Way", Ensign, Nov. 2008.

May we be wise and not "yoke ourselves with such foolish things?" (Alma 30:13) For if we "take Christ's yoke upon you, and learn of me...ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matt. 11:29-30)

Chores: Willingly or Grudgingly?

"Be willing to help in the home with chores that need to be done." For the Strength of Youth, p. 10

Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of ...work. The Family: A Proclamation to the World

"Children need to work with their parents, to wash dishes with them, to mop floors with them, to mow lawns, to prune trees and shrubbery, to paint and fix up, to clean up, and to do a hundred other things in which they will learn that labor is the price of cleanliness, progress, and prosperity." Gordon B. Hinckley, "Four Simple Things to Help Our Families and Our Nations", Liahona, June 1996, p. 3.

As parents, we know that our children, especially teens should help in the home; however, convincing the teenage son or daughter that they should help willingly and happily is the challenge.

So how do we create an atmosphere of willingness with our teens, especially with family chores? I asked families in my real neighborhood for their ideas.

• Write down the chores to be done on Saturday, place them in a jar and have everyone draw one out. Keep drawing until all the chores are finished, then go for ice cream.

• When I offered to take a meal to a family this week, the mother said that it wasn't necessary because she doesn't cook during the week, her kids do. Each teen is assigned a day to cook dinner.

• In another family, each child is responsible to do their own laundry. In my home, I still do the laundry, but my 5 year-old loves to help with that chore.

• In order to provide opportunities for their kids to earn money, another family puts "extra" chores on file cards with a corresponding money amount that the children may earn for bikes, dolls, etc.

• Instead of a Saturday full of chores, one family opts to have an evening chore each day of the week. Chores rotate each week between children.

• Two families include some "non-traditional" chores on their To-Do lists including car and home maintenance.

• One mom hides money under picture frames, vases, and other decorative items to ensure that dusting happens under items, not just around them.

• Another mom lists the top 7 or 8 chores she wants to complete on Saturday. Then the mom asks her daughter which 3 she would be willing to do in order to have the time do something together in the afternoon.

• Another family is convinced that to get the chores done, have fun and grow together, families must work together-all together. They clean the bathrooms, weed the garden, wash the cars and mop the floors together. It can be chaotic--even messy--but no one is left to work alone.

• One family turns up the tunes--fun ones with a beat--and dances their way through the Saturday chores.

Mary Poppins had the right idea. "A teaspoon of sugar makes the medicine go down in the most delightful way!" I believe that the only thing that really changes with time is the size of the body. Most of us are really 5 year-olds in much bigger bodies, and we still want to have fun.

So let's have some blogging fun, too. I'm asking you--my virtual neighborhood--for your ideas and suggestions. Please post a comment with your ideas of how you make chores fun for you and your teens. Blog Tag--you're it!